this post was submitted on 23 May 2024
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Having worked on ze ambulance when I was younger, here are a few favorites:
The guy who lit his wheelchair on fire and rode it across his house to unlock the front door.
The navy boxer who came up swinging after being cardioverted.
The two teen brothers that tried stabbing each other to death over how to divide up some puppies.
The woman who stabbed her boyfriend 15 times (including one in the scrotum) for refusing to take her to the movies the night before.
The woman being arrested who offered us all the money in her purse (probably close to $30) to “wreck the ambulance so she could escape in the confusion.”
The last one got me good lmao, I'm so curious, what's her story?
She was under arrest with medical problems, so the cruiser followed us to the hospital. She was quite chatty and at the end of the trip said “I haven’t had sex in toooo long,” and then looked at my partner. You could see all three brain cells put it together and she smiled at him and said “heyyyyy.”
We did not wreck the ambulance and she went to jail from the hospital.