Hylactor

And if you out your charizo in there, it's going to come out looking like landjäger!

I totally agree. The dude is aging, and not the greatest candidate for advanced years, we'll say. He's worth 9 figures. Please just hire someone to ghost write it and supervise their direction closely. He would more than recoup the financial hit in sales, so it could be argued it wouldn't even cost him anything.

First game that came to mind was The Looker.

God as broad: Your Mom makes you a sandwich.

Devil as details: The meat in the sandwich is a dead animal. Your mom bought it from an evil mega corp. She paid for it with wages from her soul crushing job. No one makes her a sandwich.