Would this even cause a kernel panic? I think this just causes a userland "panic"

You need a phone, tablet, or other device that’s been rooted.

Damit

10 minutes to widespread organ failure is a bit short for the players to figure anything out.

How does a search engine being offline interrupt a device flashing?

Nah, every instance knows who up/down voted any post, reddit knew this data too but now anyone can spin up an instance to get it.