Great, I believe in humanity again!
toofpic
Are you serious? Why do you care if he's rabid if you'll be dead?
When I was a teenager, I was walking past a bear cub (it was the middle of the city and some asshole took money for pictures with a "trained" bear cub). The cub didn't like me for some reason I had a textile bag in my hand, with a leather-cover notepad in it, like a knock-off moleskin. The cub slashed the bag and his fangs cut through the bag and half of the notepad like butter. If it was my hip, he'd scratch my bones.
Now there are adult bears...
Ass wriggling on a chair: it is hard for me to keep one position
You bet I would
It's only worse with seagulls. I saw a cool big speckled seagull once and decided to google how it's called. It's called "big speckled seagull". A small gray seagull would be called a "small grey seagull". All the other animals are usually called something cool, like if you see a big beaver, it's "Johnson's beaver", or an eagle, and it's called a "southern nesting eagle".
Then a fucking seagull is a fucking seagull.
And I even forgot to mention that you should have been in a cage. A big one, not the chastity one.
Yes, I also imagined naked, crazy person writing this comment, giggling and salivating on the floor
Yes, "Dear" should be either something you send part-jokingly to your actually close colleague, or a sarcastic one, when someone seriously fucked up and you send them a message explaining that.
I'm 1(one) decade beyond, and I'm super short and direct with a hint of familiarity. It also works, because it feels humble. It is humble, because you can't hide any second meaning behind "I do this, you do that, okay?"
My guess is that after he posted the video, a pretty (I dunno by what exact standards, but she does look good in my opinion) girl contacted him:
The left half of the picture - no idea, but it looks like some movie reference related to overcoming shit and shit