this post was submitted on 02 May 2024
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[–] [email protected] 90 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Yeah, no human would ever have "balls" in their name. That'd be ridiculous!

[–] [email protected] 30 points 2 months ago

Hey look, kids, it's /u/rimjob-steve!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Just like no one would be called dick

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That would be silly to use as even a nickname.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

One could even say it's tricky

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago

Lol I'll have to start telling people the J is for Jangle.

[–] [email protected] 79 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Wait, we can't give people names based on their anatomy? Then what about Edward "Blackbeard" Teach? Or Jack "Legs" Diamond?

[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Dick is/was a relatively common nickname

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And this is my sister, Vulva

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Or you were a dick to people.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 2 months ago

Or Edward Scissorhands. Or my one handed friend who goes by "Knub"

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Shoeless Joe Jackson. Satchmo. Any number of Blind blues musicians.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I can't believe I forgot Cotton Eye Joe until now.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

what ever happened to him?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago

Edward longshanks. Erik the red.

[–] [email protected] 72 points 2 months ago (6 children)

I'd pay to read a novel adventure written from the perspective of a dragon lol

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Here you go: Raksura by Martha Wells, of Murderbot fame.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Murderbot was pretty good. Idk how many books there are but I remember being disappointed there wernt more audio books.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

I remember being disappointed they charge for a full price audiobook for novellas, and my library not having the full series

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

Looks interesting! I loved Murderbot, will give this a shot.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 months ago

Eragon has some chapters written from the dragon's perspective

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I want to hear more lore about the Great Wizard Dangle-Balls

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago

The centaurs call him Front Nuts

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago (1 children)

The children's book "Drachenreiter" is written often from the perspective of the protagonist Dragon. Not sure if there is an English translation though.

https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drachenreiter

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

I mean, it's literally the second sentence in that article: Dragon Rider by Cornelia Funke

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Whoops, didn't even read what I linked (after making sure it's what the book I meant) XD

[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 months ago

Tooth and Claw, by Jo Walton, although it's kind of a Jane Austen novel written from the perspective of a dragon.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

"Dragon of Ash and Stars" by H. Leighton Dickson is definitely worth a read.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 2 months ago (1 children)

That's it. My next character is going to be a Barbarian named Thumbhands Dangleballs.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Is that from Monster Factory?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 months ago

Right, I meant the polygon series Monster Factory where they make freaks in different character Creation systems.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'm naming my kid Dangle-balls.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Either he's going to have a tough time in social situations, or she's going to have an extremely tough time.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

He's? I don't know if it'll be a boy yet.

I'm being downvoted for what I thought was a funny joke. Just like the old days~

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You and Jerry Seinfeld. Really being persecuted by the woke mob.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

It wasn't even meant to be like that. I just thought it would be funny to choose the name Dangle-balls before knowing if the child would even have balls.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

If my name was either exceptionally hard to say by another species, or if by them uttering my name it could bind me into their service or kill me or whatever, I'd probably go with whatever stupid name they came up with for me too.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

You can’t expect a Lizard Attack Helicopter to know how to write literature from the perspective of the shitheads who are always trying to break into their home and kill them for some shiny metal or leftovers in the fridge.

Humans on the other hand have no excuse for not completely understanding what it is like to be a dragon, in reality we are pretty much exactly the dragons of the real world….

…which is also exactly why dragons aren’t that interested in getting to know us well enough to write us realistically, they already know the same exact story in their own language and their language has way more fun stuff like fireballs and singed sheep and mmmmm a whole pasture of cows and WHOOOOOSSHHH.

…then again there all these stories about innocent princesses being abducted by cruel dragons right before the idyllic wedding happens and I can’t help but think about all the times historians dismiss close relationships between two men or two women in history as definitely just a really great bro-sesh friendship no queerness nope, no giant billboards saying THEY WERE PROBABLY GAY AND BEAUTIFUL.

So maybe dragons are just pulling a solid for women and periodically “brutally abduct them” (bust them out of their suffocating shit wedding on a flying motorcycle except they are the motorcycle (think Hagrid and motorcycle - Hagrid) AND they can spit fire out of both their front and back) and then when the man comes to rescue the princess the dragon gets a free meal and the woman gets to relax the whole time at the Dragon’s place and vent about how awful overbearing toxic hetero men are who seem to get to run everything in society.

If this is the case we have much to be worried about because it means Dragons are not only terrifyingly smart and powerful, they are also woke as fuck.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago

I like the name two-legs