this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2024
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[–] [email protected] 168 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

More like

"Ivy, you know who I am at this point. Let me attest that most of these people don't actually do shit. There are layers of layers of management and shareholders that allow the average generational wealth billionaire to extract extreme amounts of wealth without doing shit. That's honestly a good thing in your case, because anyone who actually has the ability to make obscene money in this universe is either a superhero or supervillain, and you would have just walked into their secret hideout.

If you do kill him, the best case scenario is a collection of hedge funds you never heard of divy up his controlling shares and keep business as usual flowing. The worst case is Luthor buys the company and makes everything a million times worse as step one in a convoluted plan to kill superman via kryptonite laced micro plastics. The most likely thing is one of those technically secret society orgs seizing control because at this point they just need some win. My money is on the Owls. They've been humiliated so many times they've been officially downgraded to "community advisory committee".

I honestly don't even understand where this is coming from. You and Freeze both have blank checks from both WayneTech and Star Labs to continue your research. Either of you alone could reverse large portions of climate change. If you really wanted to go the vigilante route, you could have just mind controlled him. Darksied is planning an invasion, there are no less than three evil AIs rolling around, I'm dealing with two separate split personalities, and I haven't heard from the Joker in a while which means we're all probably fucked. Even if I did notice, it would take me literal years to get around to actually fixing it. It feels like you are doing this because on some level you want to fail, because that's easier than doing the hard work required to fix the systemic abuses of our system "

"...So I take it the Therapy's working, huh Bruce?"

"Sort of. It's Batman".

"Actually technically right now you're Nightwing. Care to explain that?"

"It's a long story. The short of it is that I'm pulling double duty because Dick somehow forgot how to fucking Jump and Jason took Damien out for "Beer and Cigarettes", which I can only hope is literal because anything it would be a metaphor for would involve no less than two dozen corpses.".

"Jesus Christ and Harley said I was carrying too much stress. I'll come back next week, get some rest Bruce"

"Batman"

"Nightwing "

"...."

[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago (6 children)
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[–] [email protected] 103 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

The trust fund billionaire with suit nipples.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

People who are too dumb to understand comic books are rooting for nuclear winter.

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[–] [email protected] 76 points 1 month ago (6 children)

Batman is the bad guy and I will die on that hill.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago (1 children)

More and more I feel Batman in quite a few versions is just the DC Punisher going around punching poor and mentally ill people

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (10 children)

Waynetech does huge amounts of charity work, it's just not very interesting in a comic book.

Gotham also has a literal curse that makes it perpetually dysfunctional. Its cop out comic book bullshit, but Gotham literally cannot be fixed.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Gotham also has a literal curse that makes it perpetually dysfunctional. Its cop out comic book bullshit, but Gotham literally cannot be fixed.

I have a serious question, who in universe knows about this? Because if Batman knows the city is irreparably cursed (why is it irreparable btw? There might not be quite as many high fantasy wizards running around as in marvel but there are still some, surely somebody could fix it) and doesn't use his billions to relocate the population somewhere else, then he's still the bad guy. If someone else knows about it and doesn't tell Batman then they're the bad guy.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Constantine is DC. There are no excuses. Granted, he's probably more cursed than Gotham (being En*lish and all).

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago (10 children)

andrew carnegie literally wrote a book about how the point of doing philanthropy is to buy off rubes like you, and yet rubes like you still buy it. Amazing.

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

Within the story yes there's "reasons" but I mean Batman as a literary/art piece commonly has very reactionary elements within it that puts it kinda on a pseudo Punisher level within the reactionary zietgiest, for example The Dark Knight Returns has a lot of critique towards commonly apped "liberal" tropes and the Robin of that universe went to go fight crime with Batman cuss her parents smoke pot.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

I read a lot of Batman and I don't know what you're referring to. I'm sure it's established canon, but I feel like a lot of people write Batman that don't consider "a curse on Gotham City" to be part of the mythology that they're contributing to.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The curse that makes Gotham dysfunctional is capitalism.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yes, but it's also an actual curse because of comic books.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Batman won't let you die. He'll just tie you up and send you to Arkham.

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago (74 children)

7 years? That's a pretty old meme. We have already done irreparable damage and we could only mitigate it at this point.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The great thing about the earth is that it has a seemingly boundless capacity to renew itself.

The bad thing is that renewal takes time and often results in a radically different biosphere with organisms best suited to predate on prior iterations of life.

I'm less worried about how the earth will look in 10,000 years than I am worried about how humans will survive in the next 100.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You are absolutely right, I meant more for us humans. The earth will recover. With or without humans.

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Batman would rather beat up and cripple poor people who fell into crime from their situation, instead of actually doing something about it. After decades, Gotham ends up worse than when he got in, and the criminals just got crazier. He made it worse.

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[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Killing the billionaire doesn't change anything. Someone else will take his place and continue the destruction.

Bruce Wayne has pushed for good environmental changes using his influence.

I'm tired of these idiotic memes made by people who have no idea about Batman.

Only fine thing about this meme is Poison Ivy πŸ₯΅

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago (6 children)

I add an asterisk to your comment.

If enough executives get killed by eco-terrorists then people will reconsider wanting to be an executive at those companies.

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[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago (2 children)

this could have been a great thread to talk about what we should really be doing to these billionaires and their companies, and you nerds just descended into batman lore.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

You dance with who brung ya.

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

She says "let me kill that billionaire" but it doesn't look like he's in a position to prevent her.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Idk I'm just fixated on Ivy here

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I feel that as climate change and the environment more generally become increasingly pressing issues it's hard to see the plant lady as a villain

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

She may not be a villain but she's a liberal for not killing Batman and the billionaire right now.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

She’s been an anti-hero for like 15 years. Batman usually gives her a pass.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How much does the other guy in the room own?

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I'm with Ivy all the way but at the end of the day, the CEO position will just be replaced by another suit.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Critical support to poison ivy only because she's trying to engage with batman in good faith when he's the same kind of planet destroying ghoul as every other billionaire

If she kills Batman and that other billionaire? Uncritical support, I stan an eco warrior

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

If you have mind control smells and that billionaire, why kill him? Make him into a class traitor.

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