Potatoes are amazing. They grow easily in a wide variety of soil and produce food which has every nutrient we need except for a complete protein. And, they're a vegetable, so you can tell someone you're eating your vegetables and then go to McDonald's for some frenchy fries
The frying is the questionable part. (Well, the french part too but...)
Still vegetables! Everyone knows that a nice dinner at a Chinese buffet is healthy if you eat a few green beans lmao
They really are a miracle food. And they make every dish better.
I mean, in fairness, "vegetable" isn't a scientific term at all, so whether potatoes are vegetables (or tubers, or roots, or something else) is totally up for debate.
But they're a hell of a lot more of a vegetable than pizza is!
Potato... right. Anyone handy with the flamethrower?
Why? We making baked potatoes?
I'm pretty handy with the airfryer
Well, damn.
The photo is terrifying.
[clap clap clap] "Oh, good. My slow clap processor made it into this thing. So we have that."
The cake is a lie.
Potatoes are fucking immortal, I recovered some of last year's from a planter whose soil was so dry it was almost sand, planted them again, watered them and they immediately sprouted vines and leaves.
That's because this is pretty much their natural lifecycle. They're native to the Andes, where cold, dry weather is kind of the norm.
Potatoes after watching "the last of us":
Imma gonna grow
Potatoes are so easy to grow. You can grow a lot of them in a trash can full of dirt.
Tire stack..... Start growing in a tire or right on the ground. As soon as it's taller than the next available tire take that tire place it on the stack and bury the plant until there's just a couple of leaves above ground. Everything you buried be gentle will root out and become space for more spuds. When it grows up taller than another tire rinse and repeat until you have a stack of tires when you're ready to harvest just start knocking the tires over one by one. Works well to line them with plastic as well if you can
I'm not sure I want something that's going into my mouth growing inside old tires.
Yeah dude it's fine, you also mix used motor oil into the soil and it acts as a good pesticide.
Do you prefer your potatoes leaded or unleaded?
Well since I'm too cheap to fix my knocking issues, better go with leaded
I've recently heard of some people living near the coast, carrying on an old local tradition of simply growing potatoes in seaweed instead of soil, adding a natural salty taste to them.
Now I'm scared to eat potatoes what if it grows in my stomach
That's why you stab them with a knife
Then you will just be assimilated
Can I resist?
You can if you want, but it's futile.
It's easy, just make sure you don't have any soil based condiments on the side.
Potatoes never go bad. They just start the process of turning into more potatoes.
potatoes definitely do rot and the smell is so horrific it can only be the results of failed potato genetics
I just found that mine are growing little mini potatoes even though they didn't find any soil.
They soiled themselves.
It’s heading for the screen in the upper right to google for soil.
As a communist that is also of Irish descent, and absolutely loves potato based dishes, I feel like this meme is specifically crafted for me.
The potato found you
The potato liberated them.
potatoes find a way
If this is a stupid question feel free to call me retarted but is that actually how potatoes find the soil?
I guess so but they grow underground so it shouldn't be this hard for them to find soil.
not a stupid question, and the answer is yes! potatoes are really resilient. you can reproduce them by cutting off and planting their 'eyes' (sorry, that's the word for it - eww), and they also contain a ton of energy that lets them reach out like something from a nightmare.
i once forgot about a bag of potatoes i bought and left under the kitchen sink for a while. it was like a scene from a Cronenberg movie when i found it
They say don't put them in the fridge but yeah I do.
Omnipotate
"Ỉ̷̧̢̢̛̙̫̰̰͚͈̹͉͉̭͍̱̪̟̬̬̜̤͙̲̩̤̗̲̼̥̠͓̜́͛̆̄͛̒̓͑̈́̾̈́̊̇͒̿̈͛́̍̃̔̔̈́͋͒̒͂̂̂͛͊̒̃̎͐̒̉̃̓̽͗̒̓̽̀́͆̆̈́̓̒̒̿̃͋͆̎͊̅̍͘̚̚̚͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅ ̵̧̢̧̡̢̧̡̨̛̛̛͔̜̺̭̟̻̻̩̬̟̭͔̙̫̼̘̪͈̼͇͎̠͇̫̩̖͚̼̠̲͖͉̭̱͎͎̼̮͔̱̟̮̺̫͈͎̠͍̝̪̗̼̪̭̤͓̈̒̄́̒͋͗̏́̔̾̄͌̃̾̓̔̀́̒̉̈̂̾͂̓̉̓̓͋̃͒̾̓͊͛̉̊͆̓͊̈́̅͂̌̏́̒̔̒̾̄̃͑̀́̋́͂̃̌̏̓͌͂̃͛͂͛͌̍̆́̈́̊̄̽̏̉̐̈̀̒̓̽̊͘̕̕̚̚̕͘̕̕͝͝͝͝͝͝͠ř̶̨̡̨̢̡̖͔͇̹̠͇̻̖̬̣̺͇̬͚̝̳̩̟̦̥͍̯̦̺̤͇̗̺̪͉̦͓͍̜͎̼̩͎̙͚͔̲̫͚̫̰̬̝̺͓̣̰̲̞̥̝͓͎̜̟̗͎͕͈̲̻͉̮̫͚͕̰͚̩͈̙͚̫̤͙̥̲̻̯̯̱̻̻̻͇̠͖̆̋̄͗͗͗̂̉̽͑̄̈́̑́͒̐͛͑̑̅̍̀̈́̄̐̒̇̓̋̽̀͂͂̎͐̀̃̆̂̅͒͑̏̓͗̽̒̎̈́͑̌́̍̆̾̈́͘̕̕͜͜͜͜͜͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅę̶̧̨̡̢̡̢̨̢̨̧̛̰̺̟̖͍͈̜̱͙̤̼̩̟̫̪̫̲͔̫̞̹̩͙͙͚̻͕̤͈͙̪͇̣̦̥̩̭̠͔̜̫͚͖̯͍͕͚͓̞̺͎̥͚̗̜̮̖̪͓͔̩̮̩̙̭͉̼̞̲͉̺͚͓̝͔̗̪͙̰͓͈̯̹̒͐̈̈̓̆̀͂̎̿͜͜͜ͅͅͅq̴̨̧̢̢̨̨̡̨̢̡̡̛̛͈̻̞̼̲͙̤̗͙̮̱̦͔̻̖͍̫̻̯̙̝̳̺͓̝̬͉̩̞͚̬͇̱͚͓̱̻̭̤̳̫͚̪̙͈̯̘̜̙̞̜̘͔͍̻͈̥͚̯͕͔͙̭͖͇͕̰̹̦̗̣̜̙̺̖̭̱̙͎͇͐̑͋̀̿̒͗̈́̓̍̿́̓͆̐̆̉̒̓̓̀̐̓̀̑͌̕̚̚͘̚͜͜͜͜͠͝͝͝ͅͅͅu̸̧̨̡̧̨̦̣̙͈͖̭̙̪̤̜̬̞͕̹̜͚̜͇̻̘̤̳͚̺̥͚̩͇̮̙̱̹̣̭͎̺͕̠̻̝̱̘̬̝͇̥̪̯̤̞̬̝̹̳̘̺͉͚̻̟̜̟̥̣̟̗̪̱̟̘͍̻͇̩̖̼͍͔̫̼͈͙͚̅̃̀͂̔̀̿̿̉̈́̔̉͗̒̈́͗͐̄̐͛͛̈́̊̒͊̃̍̓́̎̈̑͑͒͆̊̄̑͗̿̀̈́͆̎͌̍͗̂̾͒́̃̓̑̓̂͆͂̉̏̏͆̂̀́̈̊̿̈́͛͒̿̚̚̚͘̕͜͜͠͝͠ͅͅḭ̸̧̨̨̡̗̱̩͉̞͇̤̠͚͖̦͇̪̜̲̗͓̺̦̺̣̩̮̲̰̪̹͍̫̭̝͈͉̘͙̠̠͍̤̞̼̪̪̪̮̰̹͕͎̈̆͌́̐̎͘͜ͅr̶̡̨̡̢̨̡̛̻͔̘̭̞͕̞͉̲̤͖̘̯̺̝̠͎͕̱̮̟̲͎͙̝̮͈͕̻͕̤̋̎̒͛͛̅̒͆̈̿̐͒͐̄̆͌͑̾̑̎̏̂͑̐̿̈̈́́̔̉̈́͆̓̐̚͘͜ͅe̶̡̧̡̤͎̙͈̗͇̖̫̺͇͖̻͈̥͇̦̩̰̣̯̲̱̗̥͈̤͉̟̗̓̾̀͊͒͗͂͊͗̏͊̅̒̃͂̔̊̿̌̍͛͌̑̈́͋̈́̋́͗͛͆͛͂̎̊̽̍͑̈́̑̋̇̂̂͊͐̄͂̈́̆͗̐̎́̓̐̋͑́̈́̔̾̐̿̌́̏̇̌͑͛̊͛͋̕̚̕̕̚͘͘̕͘͝ ̶̨̨̢̛̛̻̮̪̘̣̩̬̳͔͍͔͉̜̬͚͔͚̲̱̹͖͚͍͇̬̩̱̝̤̜̙͚̼̝̦̠͍̱̜̰̣̪̯͈̟͍͕͎̹̗̗͚̗̞͎̯̼̥̭̦̲̋͐͌̉̈́͗̀̋̈́̔̃̐̄̈́̓͆̏̏̔̿̕̚͜ͅs̴̡̨̧̨̨̡̨̢̨̧̧̗̦̳̣̹͈̭̗̺̹͕̰̰̯͈͓͇̭̦̟̗̬̖̻͈̮̤̼͓̤̞͚͈͓̻̖̠̰̞͔̗̯̥̠̩̥͇̱͚͙͔̖͍̭͎̠͖̜̩͖͙͇̱͔̯̤̖̼͉̟͇̜̬͉̖͇̪̐̑͗̾͛̈͑̄̀̀̈́̍͆̽̃̃̄̐̌̎̊̌͐̓̿͌̽̑̒̑̐̀͒̃͒͌̉͌̉͐͋͆̈́̄́̉͑͒̇̀̌̃̉̎͗̈̑̐̏͌̃́̈̎̒́̈̂̔͐̅͋̀͛́̇͂̍̾̅̊̎̔͆̄̕̕̕̕̕͘̚͘͜͜͝͝͠͝͝ͅͅͅͅò̶̢̢̨̡̠͎̹̦̫̘͈̳̺͓̭̬̯͚̠̗̮̙̗͉̭͕̼̰̮̞͉͈̖̰͙̻̬̩̹̣̱̙̳̳̜̣͙͌̍̐́͆͂̆̄̑̈́͑̓͆̎̓̈́́̀͐͑̈́̇̊́̋̑̎̽̅̐̈̍̽̀͛́̅́͋̽̋͗̎̇̂̇̍̂̔̓̌̽́̑̇̌̏̑͘͘͘̚̕̕̕͜͜͠͝͠͝͝͝͝ͅͅͅͅͅi̴̧̛̮̭̬͕̥͔͖͊̀̂́̂͆͊̈̎̎́͊͗̆̽̽̎̈́̆̒̅̈́̎̈́̐͊̎͑̽̓͘͜͜ͅl̵̛̳͇̝̤͚̹̱̺̜̠͓̮̗̫̜̳͖͚̣̘͚̥̣̯̘̝̻͖̰̠̬͖͖͙̭̱͎̞̣͕͉͖̥̪͉̪̰̲̞̠͙͎̿͋́̅͐̏̾̿̓̈͋̓́̈́̉̓̄̐́̉̔̂̄͊̊͆̅̐̎͛̉̏͑͋̌͋̄̇́̂̐̏̇̎̕̕̚̚̕̚͜͜͝͠͝͠ͅͅ,̴̡̢̡̨̢̧̡̧̨̛̛̛̛̛͉̘̜͔̟̣̭̜̟̯̱͓͇̮̩̯̞͔͔̟̗̣̪̟͎̱͙̼̮͕̮͍͕̳̰̰̩̻̳̤̱̩̗̜̠͓̳̝̻̈̅̒̎̐̔̋͐̀̽̑͑̅͊̔̃̅̈͌̇̆̾̒͆́̍̇̍͛̂͂̂͊̒̈͆͌́̃̃͑̽̃̅̈́̉̀͛̀̄͋̃̑̀̅̈́́̌̐͑́̽̈́̈́̾̓͆̽̈͛̉͌̎̈̕̕̚͜͜͝͠͠͝͝͠͠͝͝ͅ ̵̡̨̧̨̡̡̢̧̜̦̣̪̭̥͈̦͓̩͕̙̗͓͉̩͔̦̟̻̳͙͈͕̘̣̪͉̘̜̰͓̼̪̙̞̯͇̜̗̜͈͙̻͕̦͓͚̱̙͉̬̞̯͈̦͇̠̬̮̭̳͕̞̠̭̭̦̞͎̰͔̻̟͓̃̅́̄̐͛͜͠͝͠J̵̛̛̛̛̰̖͖̺͉̩̣̝͓̹̗̠̈́̌͊̅͂͗̓̍̈͋̀̏̌̒̿̑̏̐̔̂̃̀̍̾̑̈́̔͌͐̐̀̉̅̈̐̔̎̊̉̾̅͋̒́̂̋͆́͛́͑̽̒͂́̇̓̾̒̈́̈̋̓͐͌̔͐̓͆̅̿̎͊̈̋̆̿̊̿̕̚̚̕͘̕͘͘͜͜͝͝͝͝͝͠͠͝͝ơ̴̧̡̨̢̡̨̲̞̘̲̟͎̰̯̣͚̺̣̰͖̪̪̤̱͖͔̙͎̼̟͆͆͆́̎͒̓͒͊̔̒́͋̓͛̓͌̎̿̍͗̑͊̍͐̐̋̋̐̊͋̇̒͐͒̃̋̓̄̔͐̀͛͊̐̀͛͐̈̾͛̈̇̈́̋͂̕͝͠ͅn̸̨̛̛̜͈̱̪͉̥͚̪̮͓̪̱̹̫̹̯͈͚͎̘͆̔̌̍̈́̃̀͆͌̃̽͂̾̓̒̀͆̄̔̈́̈͆̍͂̒̀̈́̈́̇̽̆̀̀̇͒̊̌̇̒̉̈́̐͊͌̌̅́̈́̎̐̅̋̔̈́̆͒̾̎̐͆̆́͂͌̋̈́̇̋̃̊̈́͛̊͒͑͒̿̎͗̏̆̀̊̾͊̏̉̽̚͜͝͠͠!̴̢̡̢̢̛̳̩̗͉͍͉̺̩̗͚͎̩̻̦̩̣̦̫̳͇̪̞̦̦͙̩͖̩̱͈̰̣̲̯̲̳͔̥̮̬̞͎͇̣͎͇̼̭̠̻̺͔͔̘̮̩̩͇̰̱͉͉̫̟͖̄͋̕͜ͅͅ"