Some skinny girl climbed into my lap at a college house party. I was very fucked up. For some reason, I thought a good thing to say was, "Why not, I've fucked fatter chicks." She immediately got up and we never spoke again. No clue why I said that. I never even got her name, which is a shame, because I'd like to apologize.
Stopping at two drinks.
About as often as I skip electronics on bodies of water.
See how many times you can skip it on a lake.
Just gotta redraw the third panel showing the missile coming from a ship first.
I agree, but I figured I'd draw particular attention to this lie on the off chance that op was about to give a charlatan a sum of money in a misguided attempt to assuage some grief.
Or they're attempting to leverage a person's grief for financial gain.
As soon as they start to look smug about their appearances, I berate them heavily. For about a week after, I'll make them wear unflattering accessories, such as snake skin chaps, or a boa made entirely from raw chicken. If they ever ask why, I yell at the top of my lungs about how one day they'll be ugly and need a plan b.
I hope this answer was at least as ridiculous as the question.
Blind Guardian's cover of Dream A Little Dream Of Me
The imagery that comes to mind is a special israeli kid facing a football goal, ball at his feet. Behind the kid with the ball is an american, cheering him on and encouraging him. Across from them is an iranian goalkeeper.
The israeli kicks the ball, the american cheers and praises as the ball slowly rolls across the grass. The iranian goalkeeper dives dramatically in the wrong direction, allowing the ball to roll in.
The american raises the drooling israeli child onto his shoulders while the stadium erupts into praise and celebration of the kid's accomplishment.
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halykthered
joined 11 months ago
There's a pest control salesman who goes door to door every year, who I can't stand. Not only does he say outright incorrect things, but he can't take no for an answer. Every polite refusal turns into, "You know what, we can knock 80 bucks off that right now" or "How about we just make the first month free."
Next time he comes knocking, I'm going to be immediately upfront. I'm not interested in paying money to spray poison, that will end up in the canal and the river, to kill bugs that birds and frogs and bats could be eating.