Good work Ducktective, what would we do without you...

Honestly, if I ran a catering business I might put up the same sign. What's the worst that can happen? 3 horse funerals?

Ironically this is probably the result of someone using ChatGPT to write their job listing

Can't tell if that's Al or really a photo of Daniel Radcliffe...

Doctor doctor, gimme the news, I gotta BAD CASE OF COUCH-BUG DEW!

Rise and shine where the sun don't shine...

That's why we've forgiven Tom Hanks for that murder spree, we can't lose him too

Why's it smell like steamed hams?

I'm 5'4" and the term just makes me cringe. I don't normally think about my height unless someone else brings it up or I need to reach the top shelf, but I don't need encouragement in that case... just a ladder.

Have you tried eating around the lactose?

Isn't that that survivalist dude that drinks piss? Bear Grilf?

Even better would be to remap their keyboard's semicolon key to that symbol