Many rolls, I imagine

I don't want fastest. I want least stressful. No left turns without a traffic light. No really short merges. And if it could find a way to route all the chaotic idiots along some other road, that would be perfect.

The whole point of religion was to keep the psychopaths in control. Sometimes you had to throw them a bone to keep them in line.

Oh Wooly Willy, you scamp!

This is cool. Why would I want this?

You should open an almond milk store, undercut the big boys, and make a fortune.

Oh no, not again

Vegetables are clearly a fruit

Edit: I meant to say potatoes are a fruit, to be an ass. But this is somehow just as funny.

Those are 2007 pixels. Great vintage.

Literally no democratic spokesperson would use the phrase "a damn thing" in an official release. They love to posture when they gloat.

Fake. Not even a good fake.

Imma kill a few more and say you prolly understood their point about the sammich, so it's aight.

That's half of it. The other half sounds like the project to warn a future civilization 10k years from now about buried radioactive waste.